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It really is worth being friends with Max.
Well, Twitter being down is partly good.
I’m now writing my English essay instead of watching Derren’s Russian Roulette episode.
Twitter is over capacity.
New Year has started on the other side of the...
In real life
when you meet someone a few years older than you: oh my god, you're so OLD i can't talk to you i'll embarrass myself oh dfhsfg
when you meet someone a few years younger than you: ew, no, get away from me, I'll break your brain with my knowledge.
when you meet someone a few years older than you: I DON'T EVEN CARE, LOOK WE LIKE THE SAME STUFF, YOU'RE SO AWESOME, I LOVE YOU, I'M GONNA TALK TO YOU ALL THE TIME.
when you meet someone a few years younger than you: d'awwwwww omg *squish squish* ilu you're so cute, here, read some porn.
when I finally have sex
some guy: now I know you're a virgin so you probably don't know much about -
me: no I read fanfiction I got this
please-callmejohnwatson: ihocklecockles: please-callmejohnwatson: watching Mind Control and Derren is in Spearmint Rhino. lol. he looks so awkward. it’s funny because he’s gay. and all the girls are dancing. and he’s there like wat do i do there are boobs everywhere. Haha! He’s such a flirt though! There’s also a shot where there are girls swinging around on poles and he’s sitting in...
everyone: it's just a book
you: YOU KNOW NOTHING
mom: do you have a boyfriend
me: um yeah
mom: does he exist
mom: does he know you exist
me: not yet
[…] What’s amazing is, it doesn’t matter how many times you say they’re not...– Mark Gatiss in Gay Times. Well, ok then. (via marielikestodraw)
lumos-maxima: I completely forgot I have a Pottermore account
Watching 'Great Expectations':
sherlocksscarf: the first 45 minutes: aw Pip you’re so cute and sweet and tiny I just want to hug you and never let go come here I will protect you from the troubles of the world aww awww awwwwwww. SUDDENLY, GROWTH SPURT. OH MY GOD PIP LET ME LOVE YOU DOWN WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EVERYTHING YOU WERE LIKE TEN YEARS OLD A FEW SECONDS AGO NOW LOOK AT YOU IF THESE...
Why does every person I find attractive have to be...
Derren: 295, and Joe, be honest, what’s your lucky number? Joe: Well it’s not...– Derren Brown - The Event: how to control the nation (via jsmitti)
Got a picture blog, innit.