January 2012
Anonymous asked: Derren or Benedict? ;)
Me: Hi!
Foreign Blogger: Good day my fine sir; if you will excuse me as my English may not fulfill the criteria of this eloquent conversation we are having, for it is not my native tongue. Yes, well, carry on.
Me: ...
satanpositive:
My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they’re like
“How did a milkshake manage to develop an gravitational pull that was gender specific?”
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Derren Brown - "If I were PM"
Q: How would you redecorate No 10?
A: I’m thinking something like the Addams Family mansion. And I’d swap the policeman at the door for a guy with a hunchback.
Q: Who would be your Alastair Campbell?
A: Don’t know. I’d have to have Stephen Fry in there somewhere.
Q: Who would be in your cabinet?
A: All of the X-Men.
Q: How would you respond to being booed in public?
A: I’d respond by sobbing and getting very defensive.
Q: How would you deal with a sex scandal in the cabinet?
A: With a huge party. It sounds very exciting.
Q: How would you greet the Queen?
A: By grinning inanely and talking bollocks, which is generally what I do when meeting people of great authority.
Q: Would you make Scotland independent?
A: It would be rude not to if that was what Scotland wanted.
Q: Which pets would you get for No 10?
A: Lions and tigers. It would be amazing.
Q: How would you see off a younger, better-looking political rival?
A: I’d make his head explode. Or if he was a lot younger and a lot better-looking, I might consistently flirt with him until he was forced to give up politics.
Q: How would you increase participation in politics?
A: Nude dancing.
Q: What legacy would you like to leave?
A: I think it would be best for everyone to forget about it as soon as possible.
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Urban Dictionary definition of Derren Brown:
cakesandsnouts:
vicivefallen:
Patron saint of corduroy and Frock Coats.
Hobbies included scaring the crap out of students and making Stephen Fry say ‘Fuck’ loudly.
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bbcsherlockftw:
oop2iiepoop2iie:
totalspiffage:
glower:
conbatty:
roses are red violets are blue you must be reichenbach because i’m falling for you
roses are red violets are blue look at all this love that i.o.u
Deduction is great It requires precision Forget John and Sherlock You’re my division.
the pavement was red now John is blue someone else please finish this because I’m...
ihavebeensherlocked:
sometimes when I realize I’m about to reblog Benedict Cumberbatch for the 20th time in a row I think “maybe I should post something else before my blog gets dull and predictable”.
And then I look at his eyes
And I laugh and click ‘reblog’ anyway
Men I find attractive are always:
Too old
Dead
With someone else
In another country
Not attracted to me
Celebrities
Fictional
Gay
benedictcumberbatch:
Imagine if Sherlock just saunters up to John one day and John doesn’t even react and they just carry on as normal, not saying a word about what happened until one day Sherlock plays the violin just that little bit too loudly and John just goes absolutely mental.
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